Who cares if the day is flippen dark and dreary

It's official, English class at meadowbrook is a waste of your life, and a waste of brain space. Why the hell do they have us memorize poems that no one gives about! Who freaking cares if the day is dark and dreary. Poetry is nice to read, but I'm not wasting my valuable time memorizing it. What use is it to memorize poetry?
I'm not going to have some random person on the street ask me to recite poetry for him. If he did who's to say it be a poem I even memorized? Well then I should memorize every flippen poem out there.
How about instead of wasting time memorizing some guys eulogy we memorize parts of the constitution, or the declaration of idependance. Students should be memorizing something more beneficial than the rainy day by henry wadsworth longfellow! I don't need poetry for college.
No, I'm not dissin; poetry but I am dissing the school for wasting valuable brain cells that I can never get back! I would rather memorize something worth while, something I will use in my life.
I don't want to waste my education memorizing hohum poems....for god-sake the Rainy Day isn't even a good poem.

life is war; love the battle field

Another Pon and Zi cartoon.

So life has been hectic. Crazy, odd, freaky and all that fun stuff. I'm beggining to get my bearing of being a senior and all that. I meet with my Liason officer next week for an interview and I'm a bit nervous. A lot of people don't think I can handle being the in the Air Force. I don't know why, they all think I cry to much. So what if I cry every now and then. I'm a friggen girl and we have mood swings, get used to that fact.

Todays post probably has no amazing value to anyone, but I need to vent. Last night my best friend had to confront one of her ex-friends about butting in to where they don't belong. He needs to get bitch-slapped for all the trouble he's causing, he claims he's trying to help, but he's making her miserable. ugh....I hate seeing her in pain and not being able to do anything.

Oh and let me tell you....my problems seem to get bigger too. I have to deal with a few boy problems...one being a kid from conneticut I knew for one day...and he claims he loves me. Chah-Right. Then I have a few problems here at home...not even starting with them, just incase they might find time to read this.

My mother is leaving next weekend for D.C. and I won't see here except for weekends now. We're trying to sell the house, and I"m now the woman of the house while she's gone. I don't want that responsibilty of taking care of my sister while my dad works on taking care of the house and getting it sold.

I really just want to get through soccer with out going to the emergancy room again. Get through this year....you know the basics.

There is also my dear friend 'Joker' who is currently on the verge of asking me out. Or so he says he is. As soon as he gets his car fixed and a job. Which is cool, b/c I'm not completly sure about dating him yet. He's my best guy friend. I don't want to mess that up.

Ok so I totally dumped here, but I needed to do something, I didn't have a game today to get my frustration out.

do you know what it's like to bleed for something you love?

They will never know if they keep this up.
They'll never know what it's like to look across the center line at the one team thats in your way to being the champions, that one team that's blocking you from glory. The one team keeping you from number 8. They won't know what it's like playing infront of a stadium full of people at districts, playing under the lights, giving it your all and knowing that you just might be noticed.
They don't understand what it's like going out on the field every game and getting cut up, kicked, punched, shoved, all in the name of glory.
Those that don't know, they think it's just a game, but those who go out there and give all they can till they can barely walk, they know it's more than a game.
It's not about who wins or loses, it about the glory.
It's all about soccer.

S.E.W.

this week at my school was S.E.W. , or Spiritual Emphasis Week.
What they lectured us on? Media.
Our Speaker, C.J. Hitz, was ok. Most of the week he talked about the problems with the media and how we care about the television more than the Bible. Which in all honesty is true but today he talked about how girls presented themselves. He said that girls are like cars....he honestly compared us to vehicles. There are two types of girls. The classier and the cheaper. He said that there girls that are like ford rangers, or other inexpensive cars that are constantly being advertised, then there are girls like the lamborghini who don't need to advertise themselves, because they are the high quality.

"So.....Are you a Lamborghini or Ford Ranger?"
"Well sometimes I feel like a farm truck with the windshield missing and bullet holes in the body, and if it's a really bad day....my horn goes off randomly."



I'm afraid that there are more 'ford ranger' type girls out there than 'lamborghini' girls. What is more frightening is that I think I fall closer to the Ford ranger end of the spectrum. I don't dress like a slut, but I'm constantly trying to make myself happier, cooler, better, faster, stronger.... the list goes on. I'm always trying to impress one person or another. That way they like me. Just like everyone likes a cheap car.


The problem in the car industry is that there is competition for the least expensive car. So it's the same with girls. They are constantly competing with other girls to get that certain someone's attention. They dress immodestly, they act stupid, and they snub girls that are better than them.

Another problem Ford Rangers don't go with the Lamborghini. The cheap girls and the classier girls don't mix, one will always be affected, and usually it's the classier girl who tends to be affected.


Our speaker also made a point to the boys that they will either be protectors or predators. That they should look at girls not as toys, but as someone's daughter, future wife, and future mother.
That they should think about their future wife out there in the world right now, and hope that she is being treated right.


So yeah...the message was about sex....sex, STD's, promise rings, and abstinence. Pretty much everything that we knew being put into one giant lump of a 2 hour chapel.


I will say he ended it fairly well, with the over all theme of the week being media he gave us option of swithing our main stream sex insinuating music to bands that had different messages in their music, no it wasn't all christian, though some was, but I actually like some of the bands, like Pillare, and Tree 63.

The Art of Deception

Head Games-the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; deception for benefits for self


See that term, if you are a guy memorize it. That is what you have to deal with. Girls -and some guys- are constantly playing head games.

First type of head game- Girl v. girl

I recently had a conversation with a group of people and drew a conclusion that a group of girls can emotionally scar some one for life. I know for a fact that girls are one of God's cruelest creations. We will find the one girl who has something that we want, or does something that we don't like and we will tear her apart.

You start by giving her the fake compliments, but when she leaves its all trash talk. The next thing would be the freeze out...everyone giving her the silent treatment, or worse throwing the you've been removed party and she knows everyone but her was invited.

I will admit I did a for of that to a girl named Shelton, and I have had people attempt to do it to me. It's the cruelest game that every girl will play. All it takes to become a target is saying one wrong thing, or hanging out with the wrong person and you are marked. You might as well change schools, because you are going to be destroyed.

Type 2: Child v. parents

I'm completely guilty of this one, I hate to admit.
This is one I've realized on my own. I am constantly telling my parents everything and nothing. I tell them everything that they want to know but not what they need to know. I tell them where I'm going but not but not how I'm getting there. If I'm going to the movies I say what movie but not which theater.....I really don't know why I do that. I'm no longer doing anything that they would be angry at me for. If I believed in stereotyping then I would say it's because I'm a teenager, and I don't want to tell my parents whats going on. Since I don't believe in stereotyping I think there might be different reasons that cause us to 'lie' to our parents.

I know I lie to my parents because a few years ago I used to do some pretty stupid things. I would always tell my parents where I was but not who was all going to be there. It's foolish to hang out with people that you know your parents wouldn't approve, there has to be a reason. Unless your parents fear something ridiculous.

type 3

Girl and Guy

Notice it's not girl versus guy. Girls are constantly playing head games with guys. Even if we don't notice it...we are. I see girls constantly doing things that make guys wonder about them.
The first thing would be attention seeking.
It usually starts with them laughing really loud, if that doesn't work usually getting 'hurt' would be the next thing. As long as she get's attention she's happy. Another attention seeking technique is acting like you don't want attention. Staying back away from the group and just looking on with a bored expression.

The second thing would be hanging around with you but then going over to another guy and acting all friendly...this could also be considered a form of attention seeking, but it disgust me so much it had to be it's own catagory. When a girl talks to a guy and acts all friendly with hiim she just wants you to notice that she's having fun not talking with you. The easiest way to tell is if she laughs out loud or flicks her hair...

hair flicking bothers me too. Do it once just to get it away from your face, do it multiple times and I will grab some scissors and fix that problem. Ok on with what my point was.

First all theses 'head games' are used daily. They are a part of our society as much as music is.
The reason people play head games is to better their position, that's it. All this deception for personal gain.

I do want to say before I close of with my question. Some girl (myself included) have more guy friends than female friends and they will say that just because you talk to different guys doesn't mean you are looking for attention. That's true, but certain mannerisms will become apparent when a girl is looking for attention.

Alright closing question. Is there really any gain from deception? Isn't deception still lying? Why is deception so accepted in our society?

Other questions I would love to answer. Maybe some day I will. Right now I have no answer to them.

Ugh...boys

Ok so this is about my ex boyfriend....

He just got home from basic training. I missed him, in total truth, I really did.
He probably thinks I was just saying that because I wanted to get back together with him...which totally isn't it. Atleast I hope that's not the case...I might have to sit down and talk with myself.... anyway, how hard is it to say you missed someone, like a friend? I tell my friends I miss them all the time. Just because he happens to be a boy and I missed him doesn't mean I want to date him.
I told robert that I missed him, he and I hadn't talked for like 2 years. I missed him but I don't wanna date him.
Question that needs answer....

Can there be a relation between girls and guys that exists on only a friendship basis? Or is that impossible?